I love my partner, but my life is just so busy.

An Invitation To The Clean-up  Man or Woman

We meet so many couples who say that they don't have time for their relationship.  Of course, the statement is not as direct, but the communication has the same meaning.  Some common statements are:

I am so tired when I get home, I just want to go to sleep.

My work schedule is so busy, and we just don’t get around to spending time together.

I have so many events to attend.

My friends and I have gatherings weekly.

We spend time together when we get around to it.

Our focus is on the kids, they have us so busy.

We understand life can be hectic; however, relationships require focus; relationships need to be nurtured.  Letting your relationship flounder can lead to unhappiness, separation, even the demise of your relationship.  There is so much time and energy spent courting, however, many couples don’t spend enough time and energy maintaining their relationship; this is equivalent to researching and purchasing a car, yet failing to put gas, oil, or even wash the vehicle to optimize its use. 

What did you do to build a career or to be successful at school.  Did you just allow your career or your grades to sit on the back burner?   If you don't go to work, will that help you to reach the goal of a promotion?  Lack of attendance typically ends in termination.  If you fail to attend to your relationship, the relationship will demise in some shape or form.  Of course, there should be focus on paying the bills, and being financially stable; however, this is not at the expense of your relationship.  You need to give just as much time and energy that you've given to your career to your relationship.  

A relationship is an emotional investment and commitment to your partner.  Your relationship and your partner require time and energy to keep the flame lit.  There are many ways to gas up your relationship:

• Connect with your partner during the day.  He or she is only a text or a phone call away. Reach out and let your partner know that you are thinking about him or her.  Share some important details about your day with your partner.  You can even use this communication to increase intimacy. Sexting can alert your partner that there is an intimate desire that you have for him or her at the moment.
• Dating is important.  A date does not have to be extravagant.  Your date can be as small as a picnic or as big as a trip to an island.  Either way, it must happen.
• Create scheduled time that each of you agree to use for couples time; think of it as an appointment devoted to your partner. This means your partner has your full undivided attention.  Leave the phones and electronics out of the picture.  Remember, this time on your schedule should not be treated less important than your time scheduled for work.  If you are on time for work, be on time for your partner.  If you are dependable, there is no reason that your partner should not be able to depend on you to be present.  You and your partner can use this time to focus on building the romance and trust in your relationship. 
• Take 20 minutes every evening for couples share.  Talk to each other about your day.  Share your hopes dreams and desires with each other.

Assess the importance of your partner and your relationship.  If your partner is extremely important, and you don’t have time for him or her, you may want to re-evaluate your focus. Don’t wait until he or she is fed up, or even worse, the clean-up man or woman is in the picture.  If your desire is to have a long lasting relationship, put the focus on your relationship and stick to the commitment. 


Did you find this article helpful?  Feel free to share it on Facebook by using the buttons below!